The thoughts in my head,
throwing me into a pool of confusion,
on my standing.
It wasn’t your fault dear,
But hey maybe it was lil’ bit honest.
Its okay, everybody makes mistakes.
But man, what would she now think of you?
The voice interrogates me,
questioning my conscience,
I thought was clear.
It is frustrating,
as it nit-picked my flaws,
exposes my vulnerability,
then leaves me hanging to judge.
Sometimes I wish I could get into others perception,
so that I can see myself,
without my self-centeredness.
But a part of me fears,
what I may see.
Of course this is impossible,
some say this is the mystery and beauty of life.
I don’t know.
So I just live by,
wanting to be a better human.
But the fear restricts my voice,
entrapping me in myself and my voices,
living an inward life,
I needed escape.
So I hope and hope and hope.
I shall wield not a pen but a hammer,
to smash away the restrictions I caged myself in,